Amazon Customer Service: Surreal

It is understandable that a retail computer system might have a problem understanding the basic customer service dilemma here. It is less understandable which it’s one of the largest retailers on the planet.

In any case, that’s what human customer service is for — for understanding the customer’s problem and coming to a common sense solution. Here’s what happened when I tried to elicit common sense from Amazon’s customer service:

8:10 PM: (Amazon) 

OK, looks like you requested a refund for this item, but we haven’t received it back yet.Refunds are issued once returns are received by Amazon.After you drop off your return, it can take up to two weeks for Amazon to get it and process a refund.Did you return this more than two weeks ago?

8:10 PM: No

8:10 PM: (Amazon) Okay, please allow up to two weeks for us to receive your return.We’ll send you an email as soon as we issue the refund.And you can always track your return and refund status.Is there anything else I can help with?

8:10 PM: Yes, I need help with something else

8:10 PM: (Amazon) So, what can I help you with?

8:10 PM: help

8:11 PM: (Amazon) Ok, you can chat with an associate now or request a call back.You can also go to your Customer Service hub to fix most things or to search help pages. What do you prefer?

8:11 PM: Chat with an associate now

8:11 PM: (Amazon) If you have details you think would help the associate, type them here.An associate will join the chat.

8:11 PM: NNaman has joined & will be ready to chat in just a minute.Naman | Customer ServiceHello Good Day! I am here to assist you today. Could you please elaborate the issue?N

8:11 PM: I received the wrong item. The system would not let me replace with the same item, only refund.

8:12 PM: Naman | Customer ServiceI am sorry for the inconvenience caused to you.Please allow me a moment to check this for you.As I can check this item is not eligible for replace/exchange, You can refund the item and place a new order for the item. Really sorry for the inconvenience caused.I can help you with a return label for the item.N

8:15 PM: That makes no sense. I never got the item in the first place.I’m not replacing or exchanging the actual item I ordered. I am returning the incorrect item which I received.I’m just trying to get the item I ordered.

8:15 PM: Naman | Customer ServiceI understand your concern.N

8:15 PM: So I paid several hundred dollars for an item. You sent me something completely unrelated which I did not ask for and cannot use. Now my only recourse is to have my money tied up for weeks?

[At this point, the first customer service rep just ghosted me, then Rep #2 comes in, flying blind, apparently]

8:18 PM: VVishal has joined & will be ready to chat in just a minute.(Amazon) Hi, I am here to help you today. V

8:18 PM: I just want the item I ordered.

8:19 PM: (Amazon) Let me check this for you.As i have checked the package shows delivered V

8:20 PM: I ordered a laser engraver. You sent me a baby crib.I tried to return for replacement, it said not eligible.

8:20 PM: (Amazon) NO worries You can return the item i will help you with the full refund V

8:21 PM: I already tried that. It says I will get my refund up to two weeks after you receive the item.This is unacceptable.I’m asking you to send the correct item,.

8:22 PM: (Amazon) I am sorry for the inconvenience caused to you.But we do not have replacement option V

8:22 PM: It’s not replacement. It’s sending me the item I ordered.You have not done that yet.

8:23 PM: (Amazon) You can return the item for full refundAnd reorder the item V

8:23 PM: With several hundred dollars of my money tied up for up to two weeks?How is that fair.The problem was not caused by me. You sent me the wrong item.

8:24 PM: (Amazon) You can return the item for full refundAnd reorder the itemV

8:24 PM: You are being most unhelpful.

Monday August 23 meeting: another solder party

I was hoping to demo a laser engraver for this week’s meeting, in addition to assembling the last of the preordered Tree of Life badges and prepping the rest for stocking and immediate sale. But Amazon sent me a BabyTrend mini nursery instead of the laser engraver I asked for.

So the agenda for tomorrow evening is: meet at the usual space, work out a minor assembly line, and knock those out. It will be far easier than last time — I should have most of the front boards already assembled before then; and the castellated edge solder method is much, much faster than using pin headers, and leaves the back side of the badge much smoother.

There will also be some discussion of prototyping to try out a feature for next year’s badge. I ordered some Space Dust, but I’m low on other beers, so if Space Dust isn’t for you, and you’re not into Malört, Skrewball or Woodford, consider bringing something.

Meeting ON this evening

Meeting at the usual place this evening. Sorry for the late notice. Was traveling, got in late last night, really wasn’t sure what I was up for. But I got hot tweezers and I’m dying to try them out. And some folks who didn’t go to vegas might be interested in badge&stickers show&tell. Also there may be some front-side badge soldering.

Meeting will be hybrid on Discord as well. But you can’t taste Malört through a screen.

Or maybe you can.

If you’re new to the group, hit me up via DM on the Discord or on Twitter if you’re interested in attending. If I met you in LV, mention that. Otherwise, generally we like to get to know people a little bit before inviting them to the private space.

Tree of Life Badge documentation released

Following up with conversations we had with a few acquirors at Defcon, we have opened a public repo for the Tree of Life badge.

It contains hardware pinout documentation, and the stock .UF2 firmware.

This is so that people can feel a comfort level throwing MicroPython on it, or their own home-rolled firmware, and access all of the components, and have a place to come back to if something goes poopy.

We’d love to see what you come up with! I hope we got all the pinouts correct. Feel free to open an issue if you have any questions.

https://github.com/DC540-Nova/DC29-Tree-of-Life-Badge

Boundaries, directions, and taking it farther

I wanted to take a moment to give a little guidance to all of our new followers now that Defcon is over and everyone is resting before catching up on everything. Our twitter followers tripled in the past 28 days, and I realized new followers are coming from all sorts of different angles.

Hi. I’m Baab, sometimes Baabalicious, sometimes just Bob, and sometimes just DC540. I put out feelers for starting this group three years ago. Immediately lured in some quality people who brought intelligence, passion, curiosity and out-of-the-box thinking. The collaboration has been beneficial for all of us, I like to think.

We got the idea for doing a badge probably after DC27. We kind of faded in energy when DC28 was announced as all-virtual, so the badge idea just dragged along. But as DC29 approached and it became clear there would be an in-person component, we became energized again. On May 24, 2021 (yes, just over ten weeks before Defcon opened, we had a planning meeting, wherein we attempted to nail down specifics. The whiteboard at that meeting is attached to this post. We had wanted it themed for Hitchhiker’s Guide, but none of us came up with a structure or shape that really called out to us or that we found compelling, so it was still feeling a bit in question. After everything went home that evening, I sat down to do some reading and kind of had an epiphany.

I realized that the general shape we had settled on, which I was already uncomfortable with just because it didn’t holler “pick me” when I looked at it with my mind’s eye, seemed as if it would perfectly accommodate a Tree of Life arrangement. This made me nervous. I was well aware that some of the members of the group may have come from a religious background that might lead them to feel uncomfortable around such symbolism. So I tended to tread lightly when approaching the group with this idea. I came up with some mockups, and either they were too busy to respond or I can be ridiculously persuasive at times, because I got no pushback, and continued to develop. As usually happens with this type of group project or volunteer/nonprofit organization, the person with the most forward momentum tends to get what he or she wants. At a certain point it had gathered so much momentum that it had to be completed.

And here we are. We have presented to the Defcon community an esoteric artifact, on behalf of a group who mostly has no historical involvement or investment in such esoterica. And it’s been remarkably well-received. It led to a lot of interesting doors being opened at the con, and some great conversations. I suspect the acquirers had varying reasons for desiring this badge. Some because the backlit presentation with a black solder mask created an especially appealing aesthetic; some because they appreciate anything esoteric; some because they gotta have ’em all, and some, well, who had spend considerable portions of their lives in the study of the badge’s subject matter.

What is Kabbalah? Well, it’s a lot of things to a lot of people. And it’s not the same to all of them. The way I like to describe it to people with no background at all is, “It’s a framework for interpreting the world around you.” In Judaism (I’m not Jewish), it’s been around for hundreds of years. It has been adapted by others, probably most notably Aleister Crowley, and you’ve probably noticed it associated with celebrities like Madonna. It’s not my role to attempt to give you a definitive answer, that would take a whole new website, or maybe a whole new career. But if you gave me enough money, I would try. 🙂

I think maybe I was initially attracted because, you know, spooky occult. But I came back to it from a pure hacker standpoint. It’s like when my family bought a sailboat eight years ago. As a hacker, if you love boats, you will love sailing. It’s a hobby where you can learn something new every day you do it. There are lots of techniques, strategies and optimizations to geek out on. Same with Kabbalah. No matter which angle you approach it from, there is an endless amount of knowledge and information behind it. I met several people during con who have studied it for decades.

I will say this. Based on my own personal research, a fantastic and humorous introduction to Kabbalah, also known as the Tree of Life, can be found in The Chicken Qabalah of Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford: Dilettante’s Guide to What You Do and Do Not Need to Know to Become a Qabalist by Lon Milo DuQuette. (affiliate link) At the very least, this book should give you an idea of whether Kabbalah (also spelled a bunch of different ways, blame Hebrew ambiguity) is something you’d be interested in studying.

How does this connect with, and why does it resonate with, the Hacker community? This question came up during a talk I was invited to participate in during Defcon. (It was a private talk, don’t get your FOMO in a bunch). I think it was actually during that talk that it sunk in, and I mentioned it, that I think the seeds of this interest were planted in the textfile BBSes many of us frequented back in the day. Who remembers “The Occult Technology of Power?” Every textfiles BBS had subcategories. Hardware, phone phreaking, piracy, occult, basically everything us hacker kids felt was suppressed knowledge. So maybe some of us dabbled back then. Maybe some of us deep dived. Either way, here we are.

Going forward. As I mentioned before, the members of this group come from different religious backgrounds, and it’s not fair to them to attach any prejudices associated with this badge to them, so going forward, I’d like to separate this out a bit. This might go even farther in the future, but for now, the official DC540 website (dc540.org) and Twitter (@dc540_nova) will focus on the badge hardware, functionality, software updates, and the game we released. P.S., nobody has won yet!

For deeper conversations on esoteric or related matters, to exchange related resources or suggestions, or to continue friendships made at Defcon, or to get random shitposts now and then, hit me up on my personal account (@dc540baab). I met some very interesting people at Defcon, both badge-related and not so much, and I’d love to the continue the conversations. The general rule is, if it relates to something the group gets behind, it’ll go here. If it’s something I think might be controversial to the group, it goes to my personal. I don’t want to scare new group members away with what are essentially personal pursuits.

OK, enough of my too-long-for-twitter babblings the day after returning from Con.

Monday evening Discord meetup is up to YOU.

Baab will be in the air during this evening’s weekly meetup, returning from LV. But nothing at all is stopping the rest of you from holding a Discord meetup. We’ve picked up a bunch of new friends recently, both from Kevin’s RE courses and from our many, many in-person Defcon interactions.

The normal time is 1830 Eastern. The Discord perma-invite is on the dc540.org website.

We meet in the Monday Meetup voice channel. We are welcoming to new members, we like to get to know people this way before attending an in-person gathering with us.

Badge Distribution Update

So I just left the badge creator’s meetup. Amazing talking to other badge makers and doing a few swaps, buys and sells.

Right now, I’m taking a much-needed self-care break. I have to recharge my phone, mask and body for a bit, sit with my feet up for a while, and get shower #2 of the day.

My plan for the rest of the day is to be available to hand out preorders.

I’ll leave the room in like an hour and a half or so, and head down to the main chandelier bar on the Paris casino floor next to Cafe Americano, find a comfortable seat and hold court for any pickups. If any of you are really desperate to pick it up before then, hit me up directly (Twitter @dc540_nova) and I’ll give you directions to the room at the Linq. Extra stickers and support points for life if you pick me up a mocha doubleshot from the convenience store on the way up. It’s about $7. I’ll pay you for it.

PINECIL soldering iron for the win!

So I dropped my TS-80 portable soldering iron on the tile kitchen floor last week, and broke the glass covering the OLED. It still works, but it spooked me, because of #badgelife and the upcoming Defcon trip. Very bad timing. I wanted to make sure I had a backup in case we need to fix anything on the fly, or solder new stuff, etc.

I looked into getting another one, because I’ve been pretty happy with it, but then I found some posts touting the PINECIL. At about 1/3 the price of the TS-80, supports open firmware and custom logos just like the TS-80 and TS-100, and pretty well-reviewed.

So I got a PINECIL. It showed up last week. I plugged it into the same battery pack I’ve always used for my TS-80 (since fall 2018!), and it reported low voltage. Looked into it, and it turns out the PINECIL needs more juice than something made in 2018 can push. From multiple sources, the PINECIL really works its magic when it’s getting 60W at 20V. So now I need a new battery to power my new iron.

You should totally buy one. It’s just $35. https://amzn.to/3lqKDlp

I spent a couple hours looking at battery packs, specs, reviews, the whole bit. I finally settled on the EasyLonger model. 65W USB-C PD, 10000mAh. It’s important to stay below around 30000mah if you want to take it on a flight with you.

First test, fires right up, pumps the iron right up to the optimal temperature.

You should totally buy one, it’s about $55. https://amzn.to/2VhXpIj

Also get a high-capacity USB-C cable. The one I got is rated for 5A.

You should totally buy one. https://amzn.to/3xp9CrM

Maximizing the benefits of castellated edges

When we chose our badge design, we were cocky and full of ourselves, and went with surface-mount pads on our prototypes. Because our badge is based on the RPi Pico microcontroller, and had castellated edges, we figured we would minimize soldering, maximize space for silkscreen artwork, and up the cool factor by mounting on the pads using solder paste with the castellated edges.

Well, that turned out to be too hard. We don’t know what we’re doing, and didn’t have time for a learning curve, and kept running into bridging below the surface, which is hard to correct after it’s soldered down.

So we decided to go back to thru-hole with the finals. We soldered about half of them with thru-hole headers, which, let me tell you, is a pain. 40 header pins soldered to the board, and 40 soldered to the Pico. It’s tried and true, and any screw-ups are obvious and visible, but we were disappointed.

I was assembling the last of batch 1 earlier today, and decided on a whim to try headerless soldering directly to the pads with regular solder instead of paste. I used a 20-pin header temporarily on the left side to hold the pico in place on the board, soldered down the right side, then removed the header and soldered down the left. It worked great. It’s the best of both worlds. It saves wasted time with headers, cuts soldering in half, and keeps unsightly pins from poking out the bottom of the board. Just like regular thru-hole soldering, problems are visible. Bridging is not usually a problem, the solder tends to stick to the pads on the board as well as the generous copper pads on the Pico. All I need to do is make sure there’s a nice ramp from the upper pad, waterfalling over the castellated edges and onto the board pad.

If you ever have the urge to base a PCB around the Pico, consider this option.

Yes, we’re aware you can get the RP2040 chip on its own without the Pico, but one of our members bought a whole REEL of Picos, so it made sense for us to do this.

Hack your Vagus Nerve with the Tree of Life badge

We added guided breathing to our badge. Whether you use it to control your heart rate, raise your kundalini or simply de-stress, that’s up to you. But the badge now includes three levels of guided Vagus breathing. Just follow along with the pretty lights, sync yourself up, and get ready.

I first learned how profoundly breathing can affect the mind and body when I encountered a book in the 80s called Taoist Yoga: Alchemy and Immortality. It’s the kind of thing that has pretty much instant results, and makes you want to come back for more.

I was recently reminded when reading Recapture the Rapture: Rethinking God, Sex and Death in a World that’s Losts its Mind by Jamie Wheal.

I thought I’d bring this to the badgelife folks for consideration and feedback, so we included it in our badge for this year.

And no, the Vegas/Vagus puns are not lost on us at all.

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